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Down To Earth
If you say it's for the best, then why am I sitting here in tears?



Biography

Photobucket Md Fadzly
290795 is my day, angels sing high and free. I'm reletively retarded and funny, hyper too. Facebook-ing, lepak-ing, craping is #1 in my life. Treat me the way you want me to treat you, bitches shall not be entertained by me. And I am down to earth!

History

Sunday, May 27, 2012
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Last Blogged @ 8:57 PM



My first O level paper begins tomorrow. Idek, man. One of the reasons why I decided to take up the Sec5 challenge was because of him. But look, I'm barely holding on to this pressure. Each time when I am being told off about my bad results, I will be reminded of the people I do this for, i.e. parents, him. Only God knows how much I really want to make them proud. No doubt I am doing this for myself too. But remembering the people I have to succeed for will always make me want to strive better.

Back then 2 years ago, I can still remember vividly when he told me to study very hard and get very good O level results so that we can have a good future together, since he is not eligible for this exam. That made me want to do the best for us both. I just wanted to do this for him, make him happy with my results. I want to receive my results jumping with joy and give him a call upon receiving the results to break the good news -  a note to say that I have made a good start to our next step in life together. But with what I have now, with what I am today, with the results I've been producing so far, am I even anywhere near to happiness? The happiness I've been wanting to build with my other half? True enough, he might not want us to continue this relationship now. However so, after doing a good job for my O levels, it just shows how much I've done for him. But why am I even talking about this now? I should be studying like mad everyday if I want him happy again. I should show that I can do it for him, although I have done so much for him.

Just who am I deceiving right now? Who am I convincing right now? Until when am I supposed to fight for my rights? When will I get what I deserve? This is not the kind of relationship I'm asking for. This is neither the kind of friendship I want between us where it's always on and off. This is not what I'd always foreseen it to be like.

3 weeks ago, I have made the decision in forgetting him and totally move on from him. I did everything that I should/could to do so. And I mean everything. I really don't know. I just know that apart from Fadzly and I, nobody else knows about this blog. So I just wasted 7 minutes of my time doing this post. OK!! (Bummer shit I've really lost a gem in life)

Afilliates

Fanna<3 - Eraa - Nurul Azirah
Credits

View more skins @Designer
Basecode, I credited you too. :D